The Year of No Expectations

I have been thinking a lot about how I wanted to write my first year reflection.   I also figured I’d better just start and get it over with because I know how time goes here.  

“Expectation is the root of all heartache”-William Shakespeare

The Demerara river the separates Wizmer and Mckenzie

Upon submitting my application to Peace Corps, I was told to have no expectations.  Do not expect anything about where you will end up, how you will be living, or the job you will be doing.  Expectations lead to disappointment and only muddle your experience.  Well that sounded easy enough.  I am pretty open-minded, would go most places, and as long as I was working in health I was good to go.  Unfortunately, being open-minded and having no expectations are two different things.  I expected to serve in Guatemala and that turned out to be my first lesson in the no expectations rule.  Having no expectations even meant that you were not guaranteed to go anywhere, even if they said you would.  I wasn’t about to touch the hot pot twice, so I really tried to let everything go.  I put my faith in the process and hoped for the best.  Of course, no matter how hard you try not to have them, expectations are always there.  I certainly had to wrangle with a few when I came here and probably still am.  The thing about having certain expectations in the Peace Corps is that every individual’s experience is completely different.  I know that is one of those cliché Peace Corps statements, but everyone is in such a unique situation.  We all miss different things or people from home, some cultural things might bother some more than others, we all live in different houses with all sorts of neighbors, and of course we all work in different places.  How we react to everything, how we cope, is all up to each individual volunteer.  The place you might have expected to be might have been the worst place for you.  You never really know.  The beauty with not expecting much is that you become an open vessel.  As you go along, you become filled with the things around you and you begin to accept life in a new form, for better or for worse.  If you are full to begin with, how would you have room for anything more?

Walking around Linden

For the past year, I have tried to live in Guyana with as few expectations as possible, just trying to soak it all in.  Believe me; I have become saturated with so many things. Now as I enter year two, I get to have some expectations again.  I know to arrive to meetings about 15 minutes late so I get there “on-time.”  I know I will see some assortment of livestock running around on my way to work.  More importantly, I have more realistic expectations as to what I could accomplish here.  I use ‘could’ because I also recognize that I am still in Peace Corps, I am still living in a foreign country and I know the unexpected can happen anywhere, but for some reason, it seems to be much more prevalent here.  Nonetheless, it is nice to have some sort of an idea as to how things should go.  

In Guyana we have sand to sled on!

A very PCV Christmas

I enjoyed my Christmas and New Year’s here and am surprised I am already into February.   For Christmas, a bunch of volunteers got together in a town called Linden.  We had a big BBQ, we swam in a black water creek, went on a hike, and even attempted to sled down a big sand hill.  Yes!  Linden has hills!  I returned briefly back to site where I wrapped and shared out some Christmas gifts with my neighbors.  It was pretty fun because I don’t think they really wrap gifts here so all the kids took their time to neatly unwrap the paper.  I remember when I was little I just tore into my presents and could care less about the paper.  

My neighbors and I celebrating Christmas

The next weekend I went into town and rang in the New Year with more volunteers.  It was really nice to get together and we danced most of the way through Old Year’s night to New Year’s Day.  New Year’s is not as big of a deal here as in the U.S. so we had the place we went to pretty much all to ourselves.  They did however, have a ball drop!  Although they announced “30 seconds until the New Year!” and then a bit later, “Sorry we are having technical difficulties with the ball drop, but its 2013!!”  So we missed the final countdown but that is just kind of how it is here.  

Work has started back, although my classes are finishing, which presents a new challenge.  Our GAD group has also started to plan for Camp GLOW August 2013. I took an AMAZING trip to see some fellow volunteers in a small village up near the Venezuelan border.  I think I was in the most remote area I have ever been in (I will explain this trip in more detail just now).   My friend Tara is also coming to visit in one week so I certainly will have more stories to come.

 

So much has happened this past year and I’m sure 2013 will have its own share of memorable events.  I am now armed with a few expectations for this year so I’m looking forward to see how it all pans out.  

I hope everyone is doing well and are surviving the winter!  Spring will be here before you know it.  :-)

Lots of Love,

KB